I advocate for tolerance but have found too many women and men whose tolerance of abuse leaves them beaten down. I am tolerant, but I have my limits of what I will tolerate. Some argue that karma will take care of it. Wrong! This is using such concepts as karmic justice to help keep you passive and uninvolved. Life is for the living, so participate.
“Participation – that’s what’s gonna save the human race.”― Pete Seeger
With the staggering number of people on the planet and with less and less privacy, we are often fooled into assuming someone else is taking care of a problem, or we are numbed by everyone else’s apparent passivity. In this technological environment, we may rely on “unliking” someone or blocking someone on Facebook or Twitter as enough of a statement. It isn’t. This keeps us passive bystanders on fundamental concerns we have. We may be up to our knees in muddy water but everyone else on the boat is listening to the captain ordering us to “stay on course,” so we do too.
“It was back in nineteen forty-two,
I was a member of a good platoon.
We were on maneuvers in-a Loozianna,
One night by the light of the moon.
The captain told us to ford a river,
That’s how it all begun.
We were — knee deep in the Big Muddy,
But the big fool said to push on”. – Taken from, Pete Seeger’s “Waist Deep in the Big Muddy”
I know someone who is a con artist. He has scammed many out of their money. He has held as many jobs as Imelda Marcos had shoes. Most of his jobs were some version of a scam. He is arrogant, abusive and totally self-absorbed. He keeps saying his ship is coming in but it seems it never finds its port. This “someone” sent me a Facebook friend request over a year ago. Not only did I not “like” him as a friend, I blocked him. But was this enough? In truth, many people around him have suffered due to his abuses and selfishness. I have never really done much about it (except keep my distance). So, I decided to write him a letter. (Over the years as a therapist I recommend people write such letters and then once written decide whether the next best step is to send it.)
Read more at BlogCritics.org where I make a few suggestions on how to be outraged, and share the letter I wrote to the above con artist.